Opening

I am in the basement of a fancy restaurant. Waiters walk by with silver trays with expensive wine. Waiters walk by with silver trays with little tomato sandwiches. People are streaming straight from the theatre, around the corner, through the door, and down the steps; the waiters offer them expensive wine and nibbles. Romantic lighting. Money frequents these rooms.

I give my guest pass for two to the lady at the door before we come down. I am downing my first glass of red wine, trying to relax. Society. Where does one learn how to play this game? Certainly not in the public schools of St. Louis.

Introduce Rachel to the other interns. Make the rounds. Congratulate whatever actors you run into. Find Tanya. Find Sarah. Find Kristin. Find Pete. Eat the free food. Drink the free wine. Hide at the intern table. Congratulate Tanya. Congratulate Sarah. Joke with Pete. Joke with Molly. Get out.

Three feet away from me is Paula Vogel. Sarah Ruhl brought her to the opening as her date. Sure. Why not. I'd say something, but what is there to say really. Hi, I'm a huge fan. Hi, How I Learned To Drive changed how I think of writing for theatre. Hi, who knows maybe someday I'll apply to your program at Brown. Hi, hi, hi...network network network.

Of course not. I'm not that guy. I never want to be that guy. I hate those guys. At the Hotchner reading of Demons, some random lady came up afterwards to talk about playwriting with me and Liz. She was a playwright, and would Liz read some of her work if she sent it to her and would Liz introduce her to Carter. Of course, says Liz, here's my email.

At the bar later. Me, Liz, and Carter. The waitress says the kitchen closed early, but brings us peanuts. Who was that woman, Liz asks.? No idea. I thought you knew her, Liz says. That's the only reason why I gave her the time of day...

Networking.
Not for me.
Tastes of bile in my mouth.
A discomfort somewhere in my back.
The urge to leave the room.

Or move around the room to the desert table. Back in the fancy restaurant. Little chocolate cookies stuffed with a coconut paste. Divine. On my third one.

Introduce Sarah to Rachel. Sarah believes in the marriage ritual. We had that chat when I told her in rehearsal that Rachel and I had been together almost 8 years. Sarah's plays are about how the rules of love do not really exist. You love who you love, even if they're thirty years older than, even if they are melancholy, even if they are dead, even if they are terrible people and sell organs illegally. She didn't tell me this. I don't know if she knows. I don't know if it is true. But its there. I think it's there.

She tells me she gave Mark my notes. "Did you notice?" Inside I do a little dance. Three seconds of a three and a half hour play were stronger because of me: Eric enters looking for the Village Idiot. A scene (page 77) was clearer because I suggested she change 1 word. Of course I noticed. Later I will do a little dance to the 151.

Second glass of wine. Calming down. Rachel is on her second beer; having fun. Laughing with the other interns. Joking with Jess, but getting tired. She has a theatre company, Jess does. I learn today she might need a dramaturg for a play going up next March. She sent me the script.

Accidental networking. I can stomach that.

Pete has to get up at 4am to work at Starbucks, but he is staying "until the beer and wine runs out" but I'm tired. Rachel's eyes are glassy. She's a good sport.

Dance towards the 151.

Never said goodbye to Kristin. I should call her. I wonder if she said anything to Paula Vogel.